Anxiety as we age

11 June 2025 (Wednesday)

Richard wakes especially early, and in doing so wakes me… and we’re both up straight away.  You see, we both have silent anxiety today.

We’re having tree work done in the garden, and despite knowing we’ve the best local tree surgeons doing it, we’re still both anxious - for numerous little reasons.  

I remember dad getting anxious about things, and I’d say to him “Dad, don’t worry.  It’ll all be fine”, though whether it was getting to the airport on time, finding the right parking space, or wondering whether he had the right cash on him for any eventuality, he’d get anxious.  Mum less so, though as the years progressed, the anxiety did too, coming in troughs and waves, and we’d look on slightly humorously with words of support and simply think to ourselves, “Chill…!”

Now, decades on, I think anxiety is something I just live with, in fact that we just live with; not each day, though anything that steps even slightly across the bounds of my comfort zone brings about some level of anxiety.  Tree work means Fenella needs to be moved out of the drive the day before to hold space for the big truck to park… though Richard doesn’t like Fenella on the road, especially overnight in case she is damaged…though needs must.  Then a work area needs to be cleared, which I was stressing about and thought I’d do after coming back from the plot yesterday, though Richard had already done it.  Then, of course, the individual minutiae of… Will the work be done well?  Will the guys / gals turn up on time?  Will they be nice, and considerate?  How much mess will there be?  Will the job be done properly?  Will there be any damage to any of our neighbours’ property?  What if one of them falls?  The list sort of goes on… and on…  Anxiety level… 6.5 out of 10 and rising…

Then, I hear the truck outside…

The guys turned up well in time, scoped the full job that’s on their docket (it was already quoted on and photos taken), determined what needed to be done and in what order… and they got on with it.  Within two hours, the work was done, everything was fine, they’d chipped everything, cleaned up on the road, put everything (sort of…) into their truck, been thanked, said goodbye, and gone on their way to their next job… though a pair of shoes was left on the patio, and taken into safekeeping in the house until collected a few hours later - we certainly didn’t want a fox walking off with them!

Now, we have a great view from the top office, we look out on the backs of sundry houses and rooftops, and interestingly a lot of curtain twitching went on when the work began  In fact, it was more blinds opening and curtains being drawn wide, just to see what was going on… I guess not a surprise, as we would’ve done the same, though interesting nonetheless - two of our direct neighbours at the back I spied for the first time ever!

Anxiety level… reducing to normal… miniscule!  Though I still don’t think the broadband’s working at For Earth’s Sake, as I’ve nothing showing live on the till.

Then I get a call from Vanessa, and my anxiety increases as she’s had an unfortunate call with the Operations Manager of the delivery company that damaged the festoon lighting on Monday - so would I write an email for her to send… I do, though it comes from me rather than Vanessa, adding some distance… fingers crossed.

Oh, and indeed, the broadband is NOT working; it seems the cabling was damaged on Monday when the festoon lighting came down…

Work work and work for the rest of the morning and through to mid-afternoon.  Richard did his final edits to his weekly vlog to upload and put live - including footage from this morning’s tree work.

In the afternoon I’m at the plot watering, and anxiety levels decline to negligible... and then home for a simple supper, then TV; tonight it’s Glow Up and The Power of Parker…


Weather:  Warmer, though overcast with a cooling breeze.  The sun tries to break through, though the clouds persist.

Breakfast:  Bran Sticks, yogurt, and sultanas
Lunch:   Cottage Cheese, yeast extract, lettuce, tomato, cucumber and radish, and a rice cake
Supper:   Quorn Garlic & Herb Fillets, homemade oven chips. Lettuce, salad of red onion, tomato, cucumber, olives and radish